[In less than two hours, I will run my first 5K. Here are the thoughts floating through my mind right now.]
2) I’d really like some sausage, eggs, potatoes and pancakes.
3) Oh… and a beer!
4) Someone should really make designer nipple band-aids for men. There’s a market out there.
5) How much is a groin-iotomy?
6) Will they really call me Admiral McGuigan?
7) Please gods of the bowels, don’t let me end up like this guy.
8) Coconut water has the consistency of runny semen. I hope it doesn’t taste the same.
9) There will be fatter, slower people running too, right?
10) I hope they have sausage, eggs, potatoes and pancakes at the finish line.