Well, it turns out the run is only for women.
I had my suspicions when Steve sent me a link to the web site, and it said that the post-run expo included “champagne, chocolate, shopping and fun!”–the last four things on my mind after sweating my ass off running 3.1 miles. (For the record, the first four things are don’t vomit, don’t vomit, don’t vomit and water–no exclamation point.)
We discovered the mix-up when Steve went to sign us up last week and then sent the following email:
“Wait – it says ‘the kids run is open to boys and girls’ I think it’s
possible this might really only be for [REDACTED: Two words I’d only recommend calling women if you, in fact, want to get slapped in the face.]
there is this 5K in Queen Anne around the same time, July 9
There’s also the Swedish run, July 24
I’ve done the Swedish 10K twice. There’s also a 5K. The run takes you
down 12th right passed the Hugo House, it would be a good place for
people to assemble if they want to cheer the team on.”
Steve and I have talked about dressing up as women for the 5K to see if we could pass, but considering Steve is already wearing a weight vest, dressing in drag might complicate things, though, of the two us, Steve would definitely make the better woman. He’s lithe and lean with that short-haired, boyish lesbian look.
I don’t think I’d make a good woman. Sure, I might be curvier than Steve, but unless this woman is part Chewbacca, my body hair would be a dead giveaway. Not even the manliest Eastern European lady could out-hair me.
So that means we have the Queen Anne run and the Swedish run. Any thoughts on which 5Kwe should do? (And don’t say dress in drag and do the other run–it’s not on the table!) I’m leaning towards the Swedish run because it buys me some more time to get my ass ready.
I am going to need it.